Growth requires hard work. Sometimes the hard work is done by our bodies, behind the scenes, like when we are growing up. Sometimes the hard work is conscious and physical, whether it’s learning a new workout routine, a new instrument, or simply leveling up in a physical skill. Sometimes the hard work is emotional, as we do in therapy. Sometimes the hard work is mental, like learning a new language, a new way of doing things, or improving an existing mental skillset. And sometimes the hard work is spiritual; spiritual growth comes from moving through fear, meditating, leaning into our faith more, and so forth.
Our ability to do that work will vary from day to day, or even minute to minute. But when we do our best, whatever that looks like in the moment, there is a satisfaction that can come from it. Naturally, we have to be honest with ourselves about what our capabilities are in any given moment. This is incredibly challenging for a lot of us, because we suffer from perfectionism. If you suffer from perfectionism, start to check in with yourself periodically through the day; notice your energy levels and your ability to focus; notice your emotional well-being. Perhaps even start to honor those things, and recharge your batteries when you need to. It will start to become apparent what your best is in any given moment.
Is hard work enjoyable? Sometimes. Oftentimes the benefits are something that is enjoyed in the long run, sometimes they can also be enjoyable in the immediate. We generally put in the hard work because we have made a commitment, whether we want to in the moment or not. That’s willingness – doing something we’ve agreed to do, whether we want to or not. That commitment can be to another person, to our family, to a group with whom we are affiliated, to our community, to the world, or to ourselves. Maybe I should say AND to ourselves. We are always making a commitment to ourselves when we make a commitment to another.
Sometimes that commitment is only to ourselves. For example, commitment to spiritual growth is a personal thing. When we don’t meet our obligations to others, it can damage trust. When we don’t meet our obligations to ourselves, we cease to trust ourselves, and it is impossible to move forward on our path.
How do you repair trust? By taking action. By demonstrating that you can follow through. By living up to your obligations. By growing.
If we understand that we are moving toward something better, toward love and respect for example, it helps on those days where we just don’t feel like it. Invariably, upon investigation, we will find that the “not feeling like it” is based on fear of change, which is ego-based. It is good to create a habit out of doing the work, to have a daily routine that we do in order to create a groove that we can fall into, but it is equally important to remember why we are actually doing it, and to allow for some flexibility within that routine, so that we can feel more in touch with the love that we aspire to.
This post is part of a series called Monday Message, based on that day’s reflection from 365 Days to Enlightenment (authorized versions are currently out of print, working on a new edition). Check back next Monday for another one! You can also sign up for the Daily Message on my mailing list if you’d like to receive a new reflection every day. I also often post them to Instagram, if that’s a medium you enjoy.