Eating has always been a strongly social activity in my life. When I have something important to talk about, when I want to download information or decompress with someone after an event, when I want to get to know someone better, when I am working on fostering community, I always want to do it over food. Where some people will share a cup of coffee, I want to share food. It’s a strongly visceral impulse for me. When I was dating, I would frequently refuse “coffee dates,” on the principle that coffee is a caffeinated beverage, not a date.

In the Western Mystery tradition, there is a line of thought that you should only share food with someone you respect. Now, you could take this in an exclusionary way, and be very selective about those with whom you break bread, or you could use meal sharing as an excuse, if you will, to find something to honor and respect about the person sitting across the table from you. I’m a fan of the latter. I find people inherently fascinating, and eating is an intimate enough act that people will frequently drop their masks and just be themselves, so it’s a marvelous way to get to know someone better.

We end every ritual, whether it’s a New Moon Gathering or a High Holy day, with a potluck feast. It’s a good way for me to make sure everyone is back in their bodies before they hit the road but, more than that, I am a fan of fellowship and community. We’ve just done a ritual or a ceremony together, surely we can share some food together and cement the bond! It’s a marvelous way to remind us all of our humanity, that we are connected, that we have a common goal. Our society doesn’t connect enough, so getting people to sit down and break bread together is my way of remedying that.

In my personal life, I get together with friends and chosen family for shared meals on a regular basis. We create various reasons and excuses for it, but I enjoy the company as much as the dining experience. I grew up with family dinner time, when I was in the house, and I’m comfortable with the dinner table as a place to share ideas and experiences. Food should be more than fueling your body.

I’d love to hear from people about how you meld food and the sacred and community in your own life…