Anger and Fear

Anger and fear go hand in hand. For many people, anger masks fear, because it feels more empowered. For others, anger is something to be afraid of. Either reaction ultimately takes us out of our power.

As I said in my previous post on anger, anger is a call to action. The trick is in figuring out what action we are being called to. If the anger is masking a fear, it is vital, if we are to move forward, that we identify the fear.

Fears survive in the darkness – if we can put a name to them, they frequently dissipate, because fear is an illusion. Specifically, fear is the illusion of the absence of the Divine. I’m not talking about caution, healthy respect, or awe; none of those are fear.

Fear, it has been said, is ten miles high and ten miles wide, but is paper thin. But we can only know this by walking through the fear. And fear is such a strong, visceral emotion, that it’s really easy for us to manifest what we fear the most – that which you focus on, you feed, because energy follows focus. Once we identify the fear, we can use the oomph of the anger to power us through the paper wall.

If we fear our own anger, on some level we fear being powerful. Children who are taught that anger is a bad thing are really being taught to “keep sweet;” to allow others to control them and to not make waves. As previously discussed, that frequently leads to rage.

The reason anger can be so physically uncomfortable is because we don’t do anything with it. What we identify as anger starts with a strong chemical reaction in the body. This chemistry is similar to the fight-or-flight reaction, in that we can draw on it to power our actions.

When we fear the anger of others, we actually fear how anger is expressed. If people around us as we were growing up had unhealthy ways of acting on their anger, the emotion probably elicits actual terror, because the expression has gotten jumbled with the emotion itself in our heads. As we shift our own relationship to anger, and learn to use it as a positive tool, that fear will fall away, because anger will no longer equal violence, in words or in actions.

A good place to start to shift our relationship to anger is by focusing on the chemical reaction. That chemical reaction is going to produce a physical sensation. Figure out where in your body it is centered. Keep bringing your attention back into the physical. Is the sensation hot or cold? Dull or sharp? Tight or loose? Steady or throbbing? Empty or full? As you do this, you take the judgment out of it, and you process it from a place of neutrality. It is neither good nor bad, it just is. Your head is going to want to interject, to make a mess, to distract you; just keep bringing your attention back into the physical.

Once the chemical reaction has subsided, you can bring your head back into it. Does anything need to be done about the thing that triggered the anger? Usually not. Are there blocks or challenges the anger can be used to break through? Is the anger reaction even based on the here and now, or did something in your present remind you of an older, deeper wound that needs healing?

If you’re looking for more hands-on help in shifting your relationship to fear, I offer a monthly workshop in Newhall. Please join us!

Posted in Classes, Healing, Personal growth, Practice, Stress, Tools

Manifestation Cedar – Available for a limited time

Manifestation CedarOver New Year’s weekend (2017-2018), I was up in the Sierra Nevada mountains, and had the opportunity to collect some pollinating cedar windfall from trees that grow among the redwoods. It is now fully dried and ready to be passed on to you! This Manifestation Cedar can be ground for you, if you’re going to use it in a blend for incense or smudge, or you can have it whole.

Cedar is considered a Grandmother tree in the Norse tradition. Druids associate cedar with the Tree of Life, she is sacred in Judaism, and is one of the traditional nine woods used in the Druid balefire. The Cherokee hold that the cedar tree holds powerful ancestor spirits. Cedar that grows amongst the redwoods has been encouraged and nurtured by trees even older than the Grandmother!

Any time a plant that is pollinating is used in workings, it brings in extra creation energy. This is its most fertile phase, and cedar trees, especially, like to share that abundance and fertility with the world (those of you with allergies know what I’m talking about). I would almost never harvest straight from a pollinating plant – these were branches knocked down by the wind and found on the ground, with pollen still attached.

The fact that these cedar tips were collected over the calendrical New Year adds to the manifestation energy. The New Year is a time of fresh starts, of renewed resolve, and of goal setting. If you are wanting to bring new things into the world, what better energy to use?

I am offering ground Manifestation Cedar for $10 per 1/2oz
whole tips for $8 for a bag (1/2oz equivalent)

My supplies are limited, so this is a first-come-first-served situation. I would prefer not to ship plant matter (there are some sticky regulations), so this offer is only available to people in the Southern California area who can meet up with me. You can either contact me directly if you have my information, or via the contact form.

Posted in Abundance, Herbalism, Hoodoo, magic, Shamanism, Tools

Astrology heads up for end of June

Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune and Pluto will all be retrograde between June 26, 2018 and July 10th, 2018.

Mars rules passion, action, and our get-up-and-go. In retrograde, those things may require re-evaluation or extra attention. If you have been slacking on taking your herbs & vitamins, I would start back up now, so your immune system is ready to go.

Jupiter is about expansion, growth, and abundance. In retrograde, you might feel called to analyze your path – what has been working, what’s not working, if your goals need honing, that sort of thing.

Saturn governs How Things Work, laws, foundational structure, and time. You will probably asking yourself how your foundation is, evaluating how you spend your time, and your relationship to the rules. This is a bad time for shortcuts, by the way.

Neptune is about dream time, imagination, inspiration, and spirituality. Some people, during retrograde, might hit a Dark Night of the Soul or crisis of faith. Some people might feel called to change up their daily practice, others to double down on it. You will likely be very introspective. If you haven’t been journaling your dreams, doing so during this period may bring special insight.

Ah, Pluto. Pluto is power, the subconscious, revelation and rebirth, inner truths, that sort of thing. Get ready to purge, to uncover, discover, and discard! It may not be comfortable, but the payoff will be spectacular.

In summary, those weeks are going to be very introspective. It might be in your best interest to schedule some time away from distractions, go on a meditation retreat, or at least hole up and turn off the electronics. Avoiding this by Netflix bingeing or busy-ing is going to make the next chapter very difficult to navigate.

Posted in Astrology, Musings, Mysticism, Personal growth, Shift

Ayamanatara’s Latest Book

Faery Spiral
Faery Spiral:
Library of Arcadia
Volume 1: Coming Home

is now available for download or pre-order a signed copy!

Other Downloads Include

The digital edition of The Shift
The Pain meditation series: Blessing the Pain, Breathing into the Pain, Controlling Pain, Reducing Pain, and General Well Being
...and more!